What should I do for a spelling story?

How about a story about this exceedingly peculiar commuter who divides his time between two communities because he is leading A SECRET LIFE! He faithfully visits his wife of 25 years bi-weekly and assures her that it it his unusual research job studying how to tame viruent bacteria that keeps him away for days at a time. Of course, the wife is furious and accuses him of all kinds of unfaithful behavior. In reality, he lives alone in a one room apartment in the second community and moonlights as a security guard at an entymological museum because he has a fascination with this rare breed of mosquito that prematurely killed his grandfather a generation ago. If he can extract the DNA of the lethal mosquito, which is housed in the museum, be can find a cure for beanie-beanie, the tropical disease that felled the grandfather, thus sparing mankind of suffering the same fate as his family had suffered. This tale may be feeble, and the reality of his secret life is not the juiciest story people have ever heard, but he is vindicated when he patents the cure for beanie-beanie.